A SIGN OF RESPECT

I just read a good friend's blog on being respectful to others. I love the way my friend writes. She can make you feel and understand the point she wants to make.  She was talking about how growing up in the South it is common to say Ma'am and Sir when talking to adults. It's a southern sign of respect. I don't think it's just the "sounthern" way........


When I was younger growing up in Alsip, IL mom raised her children with the same respect as my friend had been taught only the Luczak children were taught to say Mrs. or Mr. We were never allowed to call adults by their names only. We even called our adult relatives with Aunt, Uncle, Grandma, Granddpa, ectt... I think we would have gotten a pop across the mouth if we left the title off. 
Mom had a good friend Marilyn Perry. I don't remember mom saying, "Carmen, go ask Marilyn this", it would have, "Carmen go ask Mrs. Perry this". So I would address Marilyn as Mrs. Perry. Nowadays after finding her through facebook, I call her Marilyn, but in the back of my mind I wonder if I should ask for permission to call her Marilyn or would she rather be called Mrs. Perry still.


Fast forward to when we moved to Morrisonville, IL (early 70"s). We were still expected to address an adult by the title and last name. Another good friend of mom's is Lucille Langen. While growing up I always called her Mrs. Langen. When I email her I have tried calling her Lucille or Lucy, but it doesn't flow off the tongue so smoothly for me. I am more comfortable with Mrs. Curvey. I just had a thought of now that FB is a way of communicating for people, why am I calling people by their first name when I would add that special title and their last name. Could it be that the world has become "less" formal, or the people I added titles to aren't really that much older than I am now that I am an adult? 


A neighbor of ours in Mville, Sharon Prose is a FB friend. When I was still in school and delivering her and her husbands Breeze Courier, I would address them as Mr. or Mrs. Prose. Sometimes I would say Mr. Prose's nickname of Doc.  Now it's just Sharon. Just seems strange.


Now when I had my two children, I wanted to raise them with manners and taught them to say Mr., Miss., or Mrs. When you are trying your hardest to teach them, "Alicia and Matthew, I would like to introduce you to Mrs. Langen or Mr. Prose", it is made hard when those people say in front of you, "Oh, you can call me Lucille or Doc. After trying for so long, I just gave up. Depending on who the persons are nowadays, I will introduce my children to people by a title or just their name. 


I do know that when I worked at Walmart I could not stand being called Miss Carmen. To be truthful I HATED it. This is how you would address an educator or senior citizen. Even after it was explained to me that it is a sign of respect it didnt change my mind. I would just tell co-worker to call me just Carmen. Miss Carmen makes me feel old, which I am not. Everytime I was hit with Miss Carmen, I would hit back with Just Carmen. To this day I find it hard to call my teachers by a title and their name - Miss Erika, Ms. Gillespie, ect... I usually call them by their first names. I guess if they objuect they would tell me, right?